Whoa did I get uglier?

I was prettier when I lived in Florida. Maybe that sounds ridiculous, but really I was looking at pictures the other day. It kind of bothered me, and then that bothered me and then I was caught in a vicious cycle. It was bad news. What could be different? I don't do anything differently and the weather here is much more conducive to good hair days. I concluded that in Florida those around me were the reason. But tonight I was listening to a song that reminded me that the Lord has put beauty in us and it is revealed when we live for His glory and walk with Him. Lately, I feel so tyrannized by tasks that I disappear. My love for the Lord, my joy found in Him is diminished. My heart is grieved by so many things around me that I delight less.

So how do I trust the Lord now? The "beauty He has put in me are for His joy and His glory" and that is how I want to live.

Today I have been thinking about 1 Samuel 8 and 2 Peter 3. The first passage deals with Israel's desire for a king and how they want to be like the other nations. The second passage begs the question that in light of the fact that Jesus is coming back and this world will be destroyed, how then should we live. I think these two passages deal with similar underlying issues. It is so easy to get caught up in the day to day-in being like other nations. I forget so easily that this world is fleeting and so I should stake a claim in what is forever, in what is good and fulfills the promises it makes-and that is Christ.

Last week I read a book that said the key to youth ministry is "playful detachment." As it unpacks that term, I couldn't agree more. My identity has to be removed from my calling. It is simply work. An outpouring of God's work and love. I can remember feeling that playful detachment, but now, I just feel crushed. And so, "in light of the fact that Christ is King", what does it look like to find my beauty in Him and not the circumstances around? It is trusting and abiding in Him day to day. Detaching myself from the ideals and expectations of those around me and attaching myself to the ideals and expectations of a loving Father. It is repenting of my need to please and my pride and arrogance and clinging to amazing grace.