Tuesday Humor

   It's Tuesday (but it feels like Wednesday) and its been rainy (but the sun is coming out) and sometimes you need a humor break (because, apparently, you're a little confused). Driving to the office earlier, I was thinking about really funny things that have been said to me and it made me laugh really, really hard. Allow me to share. I hope you think they are funny, too, otherwise I'm just laughing alone and that can be uncomfortable for everyone involved.

1. "That was a bad idea" -me
    "You know what else was a bad idea? When mommy and daddy Dixon got together and decided to     have a baby" -Mike Langford, boss at the time, friend for life*

2. "I can't walk on eggshells around your mother. She'll hate the sound and they may be brown"
    -Pops on Mom's brown egg prejudice and sound sensitivities

3. "Sara, I'm going to need you to loosen that Bible belt a little"
    -the former significant other on my movie legalism

4. "I hate my new shampoo" -me
    "That's why I don't use SHAM-poo, I use the real poo"-Pops

5. while watching our 2 week old cousin:
   "When will she open her eyes?"-Baby Brother
   "When she wakes up, she's not a squirrel."**

6. "Let me tell you a story about your grandmother. Well she talks to much..."
    -Pappy

*this is the funniest thing that has ever been said to me. The wit and timing and unexpectedness were unbelievable. I was left in shock. Well played, Mike.
**maybe you had to be there for that one, but keep in mind the brother was 18 and should probably know that human babies are born with eyes that open. Also, the poor baby brother will never live this one down.