I had a blog post that I was adding to, but this is too ridiculous not to have its own page.
"You have friends that aren't us?"
"My mom thinks its from hell. I think its funny."
student 1: "tell me I've friendzoned him"
student 2: "well, you just have to say 'dude' and 'bro' a lot"
"What's your last name? I know you drive a gold car. I just don't know your last name" (after 3 years of picking her up weekly from school)
"I think I have a hickey, but I'm not sure!"
"Could you find Syria on a map?" "I could pray about it"
"You haven't missed much except her ex-boyfriend is gay"
(when asked to turn in her cell phone) "but what if someone tries to STEAL me!?!"
"you should go to a bar. No, you should go to a christian conference. NO! You should go to a bar AT a christian conference"(dating advice from a 15 year old)
"did you know the chick from White Collar is in saved by the bell?" (uneducated, uncultured kid)
"you have a new kid your school. she has chlamydia"
"Sara, I like your guitar...and I like you"
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