To say that the past week and a half was easy or pleasant would be a lie. I could safely say that it has been the second most difficult and confusing time in my life. But I am okay. I will be fine. This time will be over soon enough. People keep asking me how I am doing. I only mind when they ask with an expectation of me breaking down. I hate that. Don't expect me to be a mess, I will be a mess when I want to be. But for now, God has given me peace and why don't people believe that. So I have decided that in writing down what I believe, maybe people will start to think that I am not a liar when I answer them. Buckle up, here we go...
I learned these things the summer after I was graduated from high school. I haven't been the same since. We live in a fallen world. There are practical and unbelievable consequences to that. Everything has been affected by this. The world is dying and decaying. Our bodies our dying and decaying. Everything from bug bites to eyeglasses to sickness are an effect of our sin. So we can stop blaming God for all this and look to Him for His gracious restoration. The question is not "why do bad things happen to good people", because we are not good outside of Christ. Bad things happen to fallen people. So why are we surprised when the fallen world produces fallen circumstances? Because we judge ourselves with man's thinking, not God's thinking. So what's the point? When all falls apart, it is not God's fault and it is not a specific person's fault, it is a result of a fallen world and it provides an opportunity for humanity to look to the Lord for His grace, mercy and life.
Now I understand this doesn't erase emotion or frustration. As a matter of fact, understanding the fallen world and a God of restoration (partially now and fully at glorification) allows freedom to feel. I can cry and be upset because this is the world of tears, the world of hurt. And that is okay. It will not be until glorification that the Father will wipe away my tears. I can't wait for that, but for now I will choose to cry when I want to and at the same time I will look to Christ knowing that because of His work one day I will stop crying. My hope is great because of this. And this hope doesn't cast out emotion, but makes it appropriate and not overwhelming.
So what does my life look like? It looks like trusting the Lord when whatever comes my way at any given point. It is crying, laughing, resting, or whatever else I do all knowing that the Father loves me. It is freedom to live in a fallen world, knowing that perfection will come not today, but in glory.
1 comment:
amazingly articulated post. it was very encouraging to me. i hope you are able to truly believe all this and rest in it as you experience suckiness. and i hope i can see you sooner than later. happy early valentine's day.
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